Isle of Skye

Your Type Four EnneaThought for December 23rd Make this Affirmation today: "I now affirm that I am free of the damage of my past." Everything to do with the fucked up man-boy is now officially and permanently in the past . Exactly 4 months since he first sneakily charmed his way into my life. I set myself free from all attachments in this life and all previous and future lives. Thou art a toxic boy and thou ruineth my self-esteem. Thou art not good for me. Addiction, obsession, passive-aggressiveness and violence and anger: not good in a relationship. Up and down from the get go. Rukhsana sent you a message. Rukhsana Ahad 21 December 2010 at 22:18 can u please leave imran alone and find a new person in ur life otherwise please get back with him your choice....thanx Rukhsana sent you a message. Rukhsana Ahad 21 December 2010 at 22:19 why are u prank calling him? Me prank call you? HA! Khush fehmiyan, chhote bachhe. You should be so lucky. How utterly f...

I've been racking my brain for the lessons to learn: the real lessons, not the airy fairy, "oh I'm in love with a figment of my imagination because my self-esteem is really that low that I'd believe my own feelings of union and then, this was verified by whatsoever Sidra told me about him being a soul mate. So I made that the reason for pursuing him, and taking all the rubbish he's fed me and, furthermore, asking for more and "counselling" him when he disposed of me like a wet-wipe and hoping against hope.. for what?" I fear men (the male species) I hate men (the male species) I will do anything to harm myself, to self-sabotage. Subconsciously, of course. I have extremely, extremely low self-esteem I should not trust people so easily, or tell them that I trust them. Or trust them full stop. Or tell them everything. It's just my notion, my mental fabrication. No basis in truth. Boundaries must be set and maintained. I will not even begin lo...

My Messages On Fri, Nov 19, 2010 at 12:11 PM from - raza1 was going though your profile its like a book lol but interesting topics to talk about As for Mr Lakha? manu1001 26 Ja'fari/Ithna'asheri Middlesex,GB My friends would describe me as Easygoing, Enthusiastic, Intelligent, Reflective, Spontaneous hmmm..... What would you like to know? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V1bFr2SWP1I Last active : 4 Hours ago And... Imran Lakha Today is a terrible day... 2 hours ago · Like Unlike · Comment . And what does this idiot go and do? In spite of horoscope saying to ignore him? I send him an offline which said: Having a terrible day? Am Reiki-ing it better.... J'SUIS UNE IDIOTE! Horoscope also says to not be emotionally insensitive to romantic possibilities. Which means I will be replying to lafunga Raza (love the name, always have) - has ...

I feel so vengeful. I feel like putting my profile on the SimplyShia website and activating it and making every single fucking male's life miserable. manu1001 26 Ja'fari/Ithna'asheri Middlesex,GB My friends would describe me as Chilled, Enthusiastic, Intelligent, Reflective, Spontaneous hmmm..... What would you like to know? Last active : 7 Hours ago And he has frigging 5 stars? How on Earth does he get 5 stars? I've only got 3 and my profile is COMPLETE! Revenge is on my mind. It's hopeless. The stupid numerology is useless. The stupid horoscopes are useless. I am absolutely useless. At least I showered today.

Ha! Typical! From: Tazeen Mohsin To: Sukaina Juma Sent: Sat, 18 September, 2010 18:19:37 Subject: This email interests you more :P "Ok here goes what I meant by slowing down: I'm really happy for the fact that you are experiencing all these wonderful feelings and even being Bridget Jones and the best thing is that he really is into you! Feel free to discard whatever doesn't make sense. Draw up a few boundaries, from your side and his. While its good to be talking about your feelings, letting him know how you feel about him, take time to develop that trust level especially with such intimate feelings. Let him earn your respect and honesty and to a degree even sacrifice. Rather than aiming for a partnership and thinking why and why not, concentrate on being friends and if things start to open up, you would know where they are heading. You talked about emptiness. That part just concerned me. You just sound like my own story. If you enter a relationship feeling ...

I've been so angry for the past day. Received a text on Thursday, but because my phone was off, didn't see it till 8:30 am on Friday. "Salaaammmm suki, how are you? how is life treating you? We haven't spoken in ages. Speak soon! Immy!" I mentioned that he caught me on FB chat on Monday. Well, I was eating lunch downstairs and he said Salaam Sukaina How are you? Then went offline like a wanker. I FB messaged him back. He came online again and we talked for 2.5 hours. As "friends". I might post the chat on at a later time. He thinks I'm a fucking yo-yo. This is him treating me like a little doggie-bitch. WTF? Why have I attracted such a wanker into my life???? Am I this bad? Is my Shadow really, really, really this bad? Burn, burn, burn. Heart and tummy and heart. SMOULDERS. And I haven't a clue what to do about this. How to answer. I wrote a long text, lambasting him nicely. Thankfully, Providence has made it such t...

"Now for the serious part. Suki, you're very hurt inside and somehow you feel rationalizing it by your logic is going to heal it. What i mean to say is, somewhere (not just about Imran) you know you're hurting but thats on a superficial level. You don't go in to explore where your pain is because you're scared to see it. You're wounded and you look at your wound but you don't know how deep it is that's why you don't know how to help it heal. You relate your entire life to people, like you're hurt or depressed but somehow I feel you're actually disconnected with it and that's on a logical level. You're identifying too much with your story rather than the feelings involved. Why i told you in one of the emails to write yourself as a character was that you may see it as a 3rd person. Drop the story Suki, explore your feelings. Don't say what depression is like. Feel it inside your body what it feels like. You'll feel the raw sens...

OK, the lady at the library - I'm going to get her name somehow, she ought to be sacked. TWAT. I will not let her treat me like the way she just did and get away with it again., She did it to me three years ago, she is NOT doing it to me again today. Fucking retard. Stop wearing that bloody corset and those fucking high heels and maybe you'll gain some humanity. Tarzan keeps asking me how I feel in my body. Right now, I feel a burning pain. In my neck, waves and waves of burning pain. And whenever I've written him the texts or the emails "letting him go", my left arm starts with the mercury type of feeling sweeping inside. I feel rotten for treating him like I have treated him. Poke, poke, poke. Punch, punch, punch. And all I want is to merge. But is he just convenient? I don't know if I like HIM for being HIM. It's an IMAGE, Sukaina , an IMAGE. A projection. Argh . I cannot let myself do that because I feel that I know it's too good to be true, that I...