Isle of Skye

I don't think I've felt such a sense of satisfaction - since the last application I did for Westbridge Primary last month. I'm a little high, so excuse the annoying exuberance :) It will be challenging - 15 and 16 year olds...? PLEASE!!! I found them difficult to handle when I myself was that age. And it's in central London, I'd have to leave home by 6am daily... stay late, bring work home.... I've done my best, my utmost bestest thanks to everyone's support... too many to mention, but they know who they are... and, before sending it, I just said "Allah, it is done. All in Your hands now." I would have such a boost in my self esteem were I to a) firstly get the job and b) do well in it and c) shine and make a difference that influence others to shine and be influential and.... On with the other job applications now... need to shower and iron and clean house first - my dad might be coming home tomorrow. Nothing can be helped. God give me t...

'O Lord, when I lose hope because my plans have come to nothing, then help me to remember that Your love is always greater than my disappointments and Your plans for my life are always better than my dreams.' ~ Imam Ali (a.s.) Have I ever mentioned how much I love Imam Ali (a.s.)? I mean, of course, we all do. His vibration is way too high for those of us with pure hearts and intentions to not love him, or at least carry an admiration and respect for him on some level. That we would understand his calibre. And then there are those who love him much more than I could ever dream possible. But I love him, too. To bits. Lots and lots and lots. In my very unique and powerful way. Every time I'm down, I may not even ask Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.w.) for help - and that's not due to any other reasons except that I know he's cool with that. My calling on Ali is of course, my calling on Muhammad. Ils sont tous les mêmes. Le même esprit. For me, it's firs...

Okay, so even though I allowed a temporary lower vibration get the better of me yesterday, I'm writing down all the high points of last week. 14 June - Saturday: Surprise rock climbing adventure for my last life coaching course with Liz Foster. I went up four times and reached the top three times. On a challenging slab, I apparently made a "very technical move" according to the instructor. I really enjoyed it because it was an achievable goal, I am very good at it, something I have been wanting to do and something NEW for the month of June. It didn't even occur to me to feel afraid or give up. (I feel "normal"). I even grazed my knee (sports injury - w00t!) Tuesday: Kept my appointment with the lady at Wimbledon Guild. She seemed very impressed with my CV and took me on. It was actually easy. I offered to volunteer for the Wimbledon Village Fair that Saturday. Seemed really appreciative, showed me around and then kept saying I am a whizz at admin and pow...

...what would it be and why? I laughed out loud with appreciation and joy when I finally got to this question on the application form. Finally. A job I would love to get. Still nowhere near what I know I could do if everything fell into place in my lap, pre-ordained. And yet... I really pray that I get this job. Doing the best I can. Trusting in Allah... not waiting for arbitrary good times like a full moon, that was yesterday. Just trusting in Allah that I get a job that doesn't hurt my pride or dignity or self-respect. I'm sorry, I just don't want to be a cleaner. And I deserve what I want and why the hell can I not aim high and expect You'll give it to me? You gave me ENLP and that was something I didn't even know to want. You gave me Farhat Aunty who was the means for my hope and for my financial kick-start for the courses. You brought me here to London and in a year you've granted me my sanity back. You've given me friends when I...