Isle of Skye

I've just finished reading chapter six of Carl R. Rogers' book "On Becoming a Person". Reading parts of it indeed reminded me of Ralph Waldo Emerson's essay 'On Self-Reliance'. The most important point both gentlemen make is that of accepting oneself as continuous process, rather than finished product. And allowing oneself to be at the time one is at. After peeling away all the false masks of one's self, we can start the process of being a person. And Rogers highlights four things that the person is then able to accomplish. 1) Openness to Experience 2) Trust in One's Organism 3) An Internal Locus of Evaluation 4) Willingness to be a Process Boy, do I have a LONG way to go before I get to become that type of person. I still have this huge fantasy of running away to some safe place, whereas it should be making my environment safe for me to exist in. Speaking of which, here is a part of Emerson's essay, to remind me of that which I would love t...

Stop and Stare OneRepublic This town is colder now, I think it's sick of us It's time to make our move, I'm shakin' off the rust I've got my heart set on anywhere but here I'm staring down myself, counting up the years Steady hands, just take the wheel And every glance is killing me Time to make one last appeal for the life I lead Stop and stare I think I'm moving but I go nowhere Yeah, I know that everyone gets scared But I've become what I can't be, oh Stop and stare You start to wonder why you're 'here' not 'there' And you'd give anything to get what's fair But fair ain't what you really need Oh, can you see what I see? They're tryin' to come back, all my senses push Untie the weight bags, I never thought I could Steady feet, don't fail me now Gonna run till you can't walk Something pulls my focus out And I'm standing down Stop and stare I think I'm moving but I go nowhere Yeah I know that ev...

On Friendship Kahlil Gibran And a youth said, 'Speak to us of Friendship.' Your friend is your needs answered. He is your field which you sow with love and reap with thanksgiving. And he is your board and your fireside. For you come to him with your hunger, and you seek him for peace. When your friend speaks his mind you fear not the 'nay' in your own mind, nor do you withhold the 'ay.' And when he is silent your heart ceases not to listen to his heart; For without words, in friendship, all thoughts, all desires, all expectations are born and shared, with joy that is unacclaimed. When you part from your friend, you grieve not; For that which you love most in him may be clearer in his absence, as the mountain to the climber is clearer from the plain. And let there be no purpose in friendship save the deepening of the spirit. For love that seeks aught but the disclosure of its own mystery is not love but a net cast forth: and only the unprofitable is caught. And l...

I am feeling quite disconnected from myself. I have spent the better part of two years trying to figure myself out and had finally gotten somewhere, only to have returned to Karachi and lost most of who I was. The 'I' would have gone out for a walk and seen the duckies at the pond right now. But, then again, if I hadn't come here, I'd never have started yoga. I mean, I remember bringing home two library books but never even doing any of the poses. Here, at least I socialise a little, get thawaab for smiling and saying salaam alaikum to the yoga instructor and I get to spend time with mum (even if we don't actually say a word or make eye contact). It's just temporary, staying in Karachi. As long as I keep reminding myself that, I won't stress out and perhaps will control the anxiety I keep feeling. I'm just truly obsessed with this marriage idea because I think it will make me feel whole. Ahem. Even I know that one has to feel whole before they enter ...

It was interesting to read yesterday's horoscope in the newspaper. ARIES (21 March - 19 April) Situations encourage an overview rather than an immediate answer. The process might be more significant than the end results. With this knowledge, you can and will make headway. Consider yourself as an explorer rather than a solution-finder. I had an emergency appointment with the shrink yesterday. Basically, all she told me in the session was exactly what the horoscope said would happen. Hindsight is the best sight, right? Explorers aren't afraid of leaving their homes, though.

... of Kahlil Gibran I discovered the secret of the sea in meditation upon the dewdrop. Where can I find a man governed by reason instead of habits and urges? As one's gifts increases, his friends decrease. I prefer to be a dreamer among the humblest, with visions to be realised, than lord among those without dreams and desires. Of life's two chief prizes, beauty and and truth, I found the first in a loving heart and the second in a labourer's hand. People speak of plague with fear and tremor, yet of destroyers like Alexander and Napoleon they speak of with ecstatic reverence. Thrift is being generous, to all except the misers. I saw them eating and I knew who they were. No lower can a man descend than to interpret his dreams into gold and silver. How hard is the life of him who asks for love and receives passion! To be closer to God, be closer to his people. Marriage is either life or death; there is no betwixt or between.

"Great tits cope well with warming" I cannot believe the BBC website decided to use this as a heading in their Science and Nature section about birds enjoying the warm weather in the UK. It's really quite disgusting. But I think I can see why they couldn't let this opportunity for making a sexual pun slip away. http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/sci/tech/7390109.stm

I know our time together is no more. then why do words come to mind that call you back? Why do I plan lifetimes that include you? Why do I torture myself with love I never felt while you were here? From 'How to Survive the Loss of a Love' Colgrove, Bloomfield and McWilliams ISBN 0-553-10492-6195 A random thought makes me think of him today. You know who. ok ok ok :) Relaxine Maxine. He used to say it whenever I was over-reacting to something he said. God knows what and God knows how many times. I just like the fact that he was as I wanted, in my mind, under my control (until I overstepped the hidden boundary and was reminded of it). He had a corny sense of humour, but it made me laugh, and that has been one of those tiny little strings that have anchored me; that have buoyed me upon the sea of life. I think I would have gone under if it weren't for him, at one point of my life. I stayed alive in order to think up smart repartees. I was so com...

i carry your heart with me e. e. cummings i carry your heart with me (i carry it in my heart) i am never without it (anywhere i go you go, my dear; and whatever is done by only me is your doing, my darling) i fear no fate (for you are my fate, my sweet) i want no world (for beautiful you are my world, my true) and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant and whatever a sun will always sing is you here is the deepest secret nobody knows (here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud and the sky of the sky of a tree called life; which grows higher than soul can hope or mind can hide) and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart i carry your heart (i carry it in my heart) This poem is from the film In Her Shoes, which is really brilliant. The script was superb. Toni Collette is always great. I cried when Maggie read the poem out to Rose at the end. Which is why I had to post it here. I should read more of e. e. cummings as well. I am feeling agitated today, and...

Rai nb ow Su kai na J uma Everyone knows that a rainbow is the result of sunlight dispersing different colours through raindrops. But, somehow, even though we know this, it still evokes feelings of wonder whenever we see one. A rainbow can only appear where there is both rain and sun. To me, this can signify that a vibrant and worthwhile person can only appear when there are good and not-so-good episodes in his life. All that is required is sunlight and rain. The product, that is the rainbow, can inspire or make one feel at peace with the world. This can be compared to how little effort is required to make the world a better place to live in. We should look for the sunlight and rain inside of our own souls. They say there's a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. Technically that is not true, as a rainbow is a complete ring of colour. Yet, we only see half of a rainbow at any time. We can apply this to our lives and realise that some good things remain hidden from us for our own...