Isle of Skye

I read in Venus and Mars on a Date or in Why Venus and Mars collide that when in a relationship, be willing to run a marathon, not just go for a short sprint. That means slow and steady wins the race - or something like that. Wish Imran had been open to doing that - *sigh* New guy, funny guy, from Birmingham. I had visited his profile last week and laughed a lot and had even spoken about his profile for 5 minutes to Sarah last week. She told me to contact him. I told her I don't want to move to from London, he's Khoja and he wants chidlren, lives with his family, mentioned his parents in his profile and is younger than I am (he's actually 27 - must be a funky head day) Good news is that he saw I had looked at his profile and has the £40 membership and messaged me on Saturday :) (Jesus - what the hell? Why am I not talking about God or work? Boys, boys, boys - argh!!!) I changed my profile on Friday night/Saturday morning in one of my moods of panic and frustration...

From: Sukaina Juma [mailto:sukaina@ymail.com] Sent: 07 September 2011 22:33 To: Imran Lakha (ilakha) Subject: Hey Imran, old buddy, old pal,   Are you stalking me on SimplyShia? My profile ain't that interesting :)   How are you? :)   Oh, and just in case you still have those MP3s of Dua e Kumayl and Dua e Iftitah by Abathar I sent you back in the day, can you send them to me? I deleted all the emails and forgot to save the MP3 files before doing so - doh! then my computer crashed so I lost them from my hard disk :(   Belated Eid Mubarak :)   Sukaina Thursday, 8 September 2011, 11:30 Salaam Sukaina,   Thanks for reaching out… I’m doing well by the Grace of God. You?  If you’re referring to my visit to your profile then yes I did… you seem softer and more open than before, which is always good. Unfortunately I had my laptop re-imaged and lost a great deal of information, including my emails. Apologies.  Lastly Eid ...

"I don't pretend to know what love is for everyone, but I can tell you what it is for me; love is knowing all about someone, and still wanting to be with them more than any other person, love is trusting them enough to tell them everything about yourself, including the things you might be ashamed of, love is feeling comfortable and safe with someone, but still getting weak knees when they walk into a room and smile at you.” Saw this on Facebook. Made me smile. Partly because it's so beautiful and chaste and pure and partly because it ignores all the rest of it. The dark side. I suppose that's w hy we're foolish enough to try again or to forget the pain. This is the third time I am typing this particular post. Due to my keyboard without the double-u working, it has been deleted twice because I pressed the button next to control and it deleted it. As though the universe doesn't want me to type these things out. I figured I am still in love w ith Imran. ...

The short story transforms into a novella. Question is: will I allow it to become a novella, novel or epic saga? Is it meant to be? Are we up for it? I know I am not, not at the moment. Nouvelle chapitre: I made a decision on the night of his birthday, 28th November. No, I didn't wish him a Happy Birthday. Didn't want to, so didn't. It came from my Higher Self. Guiding me back on track. I deleted all his email addresses, took him off from Yahoo Messenger and blocked him from SimplyShia but then they hid all the messages he sent me, which isn't quite what I wanted. So I unblocked him so I could keep the lines of communication open - and refer to the imbecilic messages when I was bored or wallowing. Good my intuition/God guided me to do that. After what has transpired this morning. I also deleted him from FB at around 9 AM yesterday - a-ha, you didn't think I'd be able to do that, now did you? SURPRISEEEEEE! I had to make a firm commitment to mys...