Skip to main content
Never write emails when half suicidal and brain melting due to sinuses.

Wtf is that about devrishes!? Dervishes love being dervishes!

Imran's writing had improved. I read a few lines now tired.

Saw Naveed and practised indifference.

Leslie sucks my energy man. Have to clear now.


Salaam Imran,

This is technically not a communication. Please NB that. Bold it, highlight it, underline it. I finally understand your boundaries and fully respect them.

I'm only emailing you because I really thought you'd want to do one of the courses for free. I'm sure there's something you still don't know. Like the beauty one, your daily skin routine is very important! Being serious, there's some on online marketing, graphic design, blogging etc.

You or anyone else you know who'd appreciate a free course. I only just found the link, but you have 20 hours so... still enough time.

The free voucher offer expires in 20 hours so be quick.




Warm and very yeasty regards,

Marmite (extra strength)

I haven't read your LinkedIn message yet. I probably never will. The entire enterprise still causes me a lot of pain and drama. God only knows why. Thank you so much for adding me to your contacts so I could access your network. But the first line said something about "life is too short for holding onto...." So thank you for accepting my apology and for being so gracious and generous. I have, over the years, assumed a lot of negative things about you that aren't really true. 

It's been a huge revelation. You live and learn after being so focused on one aspect for so long.

I will just pray that you never go through this one sided thing / obsession the way I had to experience it for six entire years to learn humility and understand that a person only ever has God to rely on. It's utterly fucked up to love a person and desire someone to the extent you even disconnect from yourself and Allah. And are entirely forbidden from ever entering into that which you wish. Forbidden to even EXPRESS yourself. I just really thought and definitely FELT that you were the "one". No longer the case, but up until February 2016 I had.

I will eventually stop thinking about you entirely. Indifference is SUCH a blessing once mastered. The aim is for as soon as this FINAL email is sent! :)

Just know that you're doing amazingly in your life and when the time is right, your path to greater awareness of God and your place in the world will unfold. It can't not. You've been chosen to do some special things on this planet, to help others, guide, teach... maybe. But it starts with a willingness to let Life and God break you. Not all of us have the courage to become besotted by the Divine Friend. We all are called crazy dervishes and it's not so nice a role to play...

Inshallah once I've published my poems and other writings in hardback with a real publisher in a few years time, I'll send you a copy since quite a few are about or inspired by you. Something to look forward to :)

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The parents

Your Type Four EnneaThought for January 13th— Reflect on your childhood today. As a child, did you believe you were not like your parents? Did you feel that you were not "seen" by your parents and that you did not connect sufficiently with your parents? As an adult, what does this have to do with you now? (The Wisdom of the Enneagram, 182) As I've said myriad times before, these things just slap me in the face with a wet fish most days. I suppose it makes sense that I should send Reiki healing to my relationships with my father and my mother. Haven't really done that for ages. It's too hard sometimes, I choose to ignore and avoid dealing with them mainly because these are the two people I've been connected with since birth. A lot of effort is required in order to 'let things slide'. Living with my dad is hell, and I'm co-creating it on purpose, as part of my desire to annoy, to hurt him the way he hurts me. My mum, well, I guess we'...
Post a Comment
Read more

Je dois écrire

Je dois écrire . L'ironie est que quand j'avais le temps, je na'i pu pas fair rien . Doesn't matter, I have to write. I keep listening to poets like Keane and Travis and Darren Hayes and I'm here, with the creativity finally bursting forth again, and what's more, the joie de vivre bursting through and I'm not writing and I'm not taking pictures and I'm doing bloody cashier work at Oxfam. I am a swan, I am a seagull that glides and glides. I am the tree, the squirrel. Words are all I have to make myself different from you lot. To make myself lighter, somewhat more worthy. How low is my self esteem that I still believe those falsehoods. I just cannot find people on my wave length. It means I never shall. Or I do and because of my skin colour or because I am behind the Oxfam counter, or because I am in Morden, or London, or the UK, I shall never know. An opera singer. A person who wants to wear kurtis but is scared of going into a desi shop i...
Post a Comment
Read more

Judgement

Tarot Card Interpretation & Meaning - (20) Judgment Introduction: Judgment can be a card about jumping to conclusions, decisions and judgments. which are too hastily made. If you are prone to such things, this is a clear signal to slow down and give things more thought and to give people "more chances." This can be a real time of spiritual awakening.           General: In general, if you are the one tending to jump to conclusions, you can put a stop to it. If others are making these kinds of decisions about you or about someone you care for, there is really very little you can do, apart from realizing that it's their problem, not yours. Health: This is an important time to let go of the past and any wrongs that you perceive were done to you, particularly if you are dealing with chronic medical issues. Letting go of your need to be right will go a long way toward helping you to feel better. Besides, if ...
Post a Comment
Read more