Skip to main content

I can start hurting now

Suki, now you can truly grieve and gain closure - c'est finis!!!

Try to smile through your tears, ok? It was never going to happen. You're still too screwed up. You have so many other important things to do with your life than meet someone, marry, have sex..... ewwwwww gross!

It was too Khoja a set-up anyway. You didn't even have the guts to meet him. Little girl. Little delusional girl.

Well, at least this brought Sidra and EFT into your life. And clarity and God's support about your life purpose.

And you were happy for a little while.

Be kind to yourself and stay away from the junk food shit. Please. And away from traffic - that's easy enough: I'm at home.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Today
14:55
:P:P "even if you cannot be nice"?
How much of a domantrix do you imagine me to be?
argh

14:55
a very big one!
lol
14:55
replace with meanie
14:55
lol
Inshallah i'll remember that one
how are you?
14:56
Well, I can say the same about you :P:P
14:56
lol
:):)
seriously, you had to use the word dominatrix!!!!
14:56
LOL.... vivid imagination, what can I say?
14:57
im imagining you in something in PVC and whips... (closes eyes)
14:57
:P:P dammit
14:57
lol
14:57
maintain y our haya
14:58
so i thought your man boy would be run over by the bus, not the domi!!!
domi being you!
14:58
haha
waht the hell is going on here?
have you had a personality transplant?
14:59
lol... maintain our cold war is becayse you want put down your arms...
14:59
or are you in your Jekyll phase right about now?
14:59
ouch!
14:59
you're actually using the word man boy?
shocked
14:59
suprised obviously!!!
14:59
very
14:59
no i met someone, shes cool
mums not too pleased
thats why i was sad
:(:(
15:00
huh?
explain
15:01
through a miracle met a nice decent shia chick...
been talking for a 2 weeks
seen her last Friday and sunday - two times in a week... wooooooow!
call my mum, try and update
her
she knows the girl, says i have to end it!!!
doesnt like her... and her family!!!
apparently they are schemers!!!
15:03
OK, even though this is an extremely painful convo for me to have with you at this juncture
what does your instinct/gut say?

15:03
sorry sukaina...
didnt mean it that way!
15:03
i'm sure you didn't
15:04
no seriously didnt mean it that way...

15:04
and i said i know you didn't... i have this intuition that you are a very nice person
so anyway..... leaving aside my emo ways
what do your instincts say about this person?
OK, actually
I can't do this. I'm sorry.
Wanted to just tell you that the reason why I wrote those texts last week was because it hurts too much right now just to be "friends" with you
I felt a connection (was obviously dead wrong)
So.... well..... I'm going offline now......
Take care and you can email me about this if you want (dunno if you want - I can be the counsellor to the impervious Irishman - just not today)
So....... ta ta for now (ttfn)
Will resurface when I get over the pain - it comes and goes.... :P:P

~~~

I've just deleted the SimplyShia profile. I'm not looking to marry.

And I'm a pagan, anyway.
Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The parents

Your Type Four EnneaThought for January 13th— Reflect on your childhood today. As a child, did you believe you were not like your parents? Did you feel that you were not "seen" by your parents and that you did not connect sufficiently with your parents? As an adult, what does this have to do with you now? (The Wisdom of the Enneagram, 182) As I've said myriad times before, these things just slap me in the face with a wet fish most days. I suppose it makes sense that I should send Reiki healing to my relationships with my father and my mother. Haven't really done that for ages. It's too hard sometimes, I choose to ignore and avoid dealing with them mainly because these are the two people I've been connected with since birth. A lot of effort is required in order to 'let things slide'. Living with my dad is hell, and I'm co-creating it on purpose, as part of my desire to annoy, to hurt him the way he hurts me. My mum, well, I guess we'...
Post a Comment
Read more

Je dois écrire

Je dois écrire . L'ironie est que quand j'avais le temps, je na'i pu pas fair rien . Doesn't matter, I have to write. I keep listening to poets like Keane and Travis and Darren Hayes and I'm here, with the creativity finally bursting forth again, and what's more, the joie de vivre bursting through and I'm not writing and I'm not taking pictures and I'm doing bloody cashier work at Oxfam. I am a swan, I am a seagull that glides and glides. I am the tree, the squirrel. Words are all I have to make myself different from you lot. To make myself lighter, somewhat more worthy. How low is my self esteem that I still believe those falsehoods. I just cannot find people on my wave length. It means I never shall. Or I do and because of my skin colour or because I am behind the Oxfam counter, or because I am in Morden, or London, or the UK, I shall never know. An opera singer. A person who wants to wear kurtis but is scared of going into a desi shop i...
Post a Comment
Read more

Judgement

Tarot Card Interpretation & Meaning - (20) Judgment Introduction: Judgment can be a card about jumping to conclusions, decisions and judgments. which are too hastily made. If you are prone to such things, this is a clear signal to slow down and give things more thought and to give people "more chances." This can be a real time of spiritual awakening.           General: In general, if you are the one tending to jump to conclusions, you can put a stop to it. If others are making these kinds of decisions about you or about someone you care for, there is really very little you can do, apart from realizing that it's their problem, not yours. Health: This is an important time to let go of the past and any wrongs that you perceive were done to you, particularly if you are dealing with chronic medical issues. Letting go of your need to be right will go a long way toward helping you to feel better. Besides, if ...
Post a Comment
Read more