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too irresistable not to post

I’ve learned that taking it easy and following your natural rhythms is much more important than productivity. What matters most is how much joy you’re currently experiencing in the present moment. If you’re putting off your happiness until you accomplish something, you’re failing at life.
Jonathon Mead

Harumph. He should be one of those voices in my head.

I have to bring happyness or satisfaction or contentment into my life. So you're here and not there. So you're not at work and are at home. So your brain comes up with these wonderful and glorious idaes: become a counsellor for new Muslims and gay people and suicidals. Can you do it now? no..... since you too are in and out of the religion and suicidal or self destroying at the very least and you're open to being bisexual yourself. So Islamic counsellor may not actually make you happy, even though you feel you "should" do it.

Does writing a short story give you pleasure? Not really. I have no inspiration. I'm doing just because I heard about it on the radio and consider that a sign that I should do it. Maybe I can. Win the prize money. Earn my sustenance. If it gives you pleasure, you'll do it. But right now you still think it's fuzool. Fair enough.

Let it slide...for the time being.

What does make you happy? Honestly.

These days...

  • Listening to Adam Lambert's Mad World and Tracks of My Tears
  • My two kittens, Tigger and Munna (because I just couldn't think up a good enough name, okay?!)
  • The days I do yoga.
  • The days I do my guided meditations.
  • Walking at Aga Khan (the days I feel like it)
  • Chocolate. Cake. A combination of the two.


  • The days I don't let it rip onto my mum and just swallow all the criticisms and complaints and jabs and stabs...
  • Talking to Taz, planning days and times when I can meet Taz, actually meeting Taz, the silent moments we share, her texts, her emails, her thoughts, just her. When she herself is happy (though I do have to force myself to get over the initial envy of her being happy through work and socialising! I said I was being honest)
  • Anticipating meeting with Farhat in the (very high) hopes she'll help me see and know better. But what is one therapy session going to achieve - all that? Highly unlikely.
  • The intermittent thoughts that I may actually love a man in the best possible way. And vice versa. And that I may actually get to marry him, too!
  • the thought that I may some time in the future understand that happiness is my birthright and not have to work so damned hard with lists and chocolate and music and movies and kittens and reading and all not have to deal with the rush and cacophony of the negativity and sadness and guilt and the rest of it and just

be.
happy.
now.

And knowing that that will make God happy too.

I'm sure there are others but can't think of them right now.

Oh yes, when we have electricity for really, really long periods of time.

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