Well, it is very clear that S thinks that I have become psychotic. Screw her. She's only been trained in organizational psychology, anyway. She is a fucking academic who has no idea whatsoever. Fuck them all. I thought she would at least---but that's the whole fucking problem. There is no one. There are bloody NHS psychs who put you on a bloody wait list and don't ever tell you WHEN. There is God who KNEW all this was going to happen and still allows it to continue because natural laws cannot be superseded for anyone except His chosen ones. Not even for Moses.
Fuck her - self-diagnose, she says. Fuck. After all that training, it is clear that humans know jack about anything. It's all superficial and of no value whatsoever. I really do hope I can get up enough guts to kill myself. I am beginning to admire the men who hang themselves, shoot themselves, drown themselves, smoke themselves. These methods need time and guts and they have it when they are successful.
Fucking psychosis, eh?
I'll show you all that fuck you. I don't frigging care. Nobody ever has cared enough for me. I am a glory-seeker, I see. I am dependent. I am lazy. I am everything that you fucking hypocrites are too, you know fucking wankers may you eat your balls and excrete your blood till rivers cascade over your sheets.
I am a menace to myself, only menace is such a mundane word but I lack others.
Fuck her - self-diagnose, she says. Fuck. After all that training, it is clear that humans know jack about anything. It's all superficial and of no value whatsoever. I really do hope I can get up enough guts to kill myself. I am beginning to admire the men who hang themselves, shoot themselves, drown themselves, smoke themselves. These methods need time and guts and they have it when they are successful.
Fucking psychosis, eh?
I'll show you all that fuck you. I don't frigging care. Nobody ever has cared enough for me. I am a glory-seeker, I see. I am dependent. I am lazy. I am everything that you fucking hypocrites are too, you know fucking wankers may you eat your balls and excrete your blood till rivers cascade over your sheets.
I am a menace to myself, only menace is such a mundane word but I lack others.
Comments